My Testimony

This is a story about a murderer, a liar, a thief, and a sinner. This is my story. 

You know that kid, the one who's always the teacher's favorite, straight A's, and has a seemingly easy life? Yeah, that was me. My teachers loved me, my parents loved me... I was definitely a "goodie-two-shoes". 

I was born and raised by two amazing parents. They loved my siblings, me, and most importantly, the Lord. Being born into a Christian family, I knew what was right and wrong. I grew up reading the Bible, praying, and going to church. In 2nd grade, my family and I moved to another state- which meant a new town, new school, new church, new friends, and a new life. Unknown to me, God was working great things into my life. 

Second through seventh grade past. I got straight A's, excelled at volleyball, and was enjoying a carefree life. But during my eighth grade year, I realized what a huge sinner I am.

As the youngest of three, I constantly fought for attention. I wanted to be recognized. To the world, I was a quiet, peaceful girl with a Christian family, Christian friends, and a Christian church. However, to my brother and sister, I was a loud, obnoxious, selfish pre-teen who wanted her way and would do anything to get it. Like I said, God was working great things into my life.

My 8th grade year soon approached. I still attended a private classical Christian school and was living in the shadow of my older siblings. But then, my Bible teacher had my class read through the entire New Testament. September- June, we read and summarized every single chapter. This seemingly impossible task soon became one of my favorite classes I have ever taken. I was convicted of my sin and realized how much I truly, truly need a Savior. One of the most impacting verses I read all year is found in 2 Timothy 2:22, "So flee also youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart." 

Throughout that year, I attended a Bible study with the girls in my class. We spent an entire year on the book of Philippians. Every Wednesday we poured out our hearts to each other and devoured our Bibles. Throughout the weeks, we prayed for each other and over the year, became great friends. God was doing great things.

Then the end of 8th grade came. Finally, my sister graduated from high school. Summer came. I spent hours with my brother and sister, and really truly began to have a personal, inseparable, and godly relationship with them. They became my best friends.

Then on July 5, 2011, my dad took a job in North Dakota. He had worked as an independent contractor for years, and this was new territory. He began working for 4 weeks at a time and then coming home for one week. At first, I didn't realize quite how huge this was. But first, let me tell you about my relationship with my dad. Since I was born, he has always been there for me. And I mean always. Every single school play, soccer game, and piano recital, he was in the front row cheering me on. In kinder-prep, I can remember going to his job site and "helping" him build houses. I remember begging him to let me climb up the ladder, or sweep up the saw dust. All that to say, I have always been close to my dad. He has always been the first person I go to and a constant source of wisdom. So, you can imagine how difficult it has been with him living 1,024 miles, 16 hours and 11 minutes away. Like I said, God was working great things into my life.

Then school started. I was officially a "high schooler". My sister left for college in England (of all places), my dad still visited every 4 weeks, and my mom, brother, and I were still at home. Besides my family being apart, more troubles entered my life. My "friends" weren't there to help me, I certainly wasn't a teacher's pet anymore, and my spiritual life began to slop down...

I knew I could rely on a few people, myself included. I became very independent. I wouldn't ask for help, I wouldn't talk about my feelings, and I certainly wouldn't talk about my family. But one Person was always there for me. However, I was too thick to realize. While my parents, siblings, and friends failed, God didn't. He held true to His promise:

"And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus." ~Philippians 4:19

Without my knowledge, God prepared for me a strong mom, a caring brother, and faithful friends. I don't mean to say that my dad and sister weren't there for me, they absolutely were. But at the time, they weren't present. And this was all part of God's wonderful plan. A few weeks ago I (once again) realized my need for a Savior. I realized how much sin I had been living in and was unwilling to give up. I wanted my family to be together, and for several months, that's all I thought about. But thankfully God stopped my self-destructive nature and helped me through everything.

While I still regularly struggle, I know one thing to be true: God loves me and will always be watching out for me. Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good,for those who are called according to his purpose."

I am a sinner. I am in constant need of forgiveness. I am a murderer, a liar, a thief, and a sinner. The road is rough. It is long, narrow, and easy to stray from. But I have been blessed with a gift: the mercy, grace, love, and forgiveness of the One, True God.